January 2011
31 posts
“Teenage girls curl up together like newborn puppies, painting one another’s toes as if they were licking one another’s ears. If you sit long enough in any Starbucks, or loiter outside any high school, you will see girls climbing onto one another’s laps, kissing on the lips. They aren’t hitting on each other, not precisely, though they are in a constant state of arousal that borders on the...
Sometimes I forget that I have a job beyond posting photos of X-Girl (RIP, RIP, RIP) dresses and complaining about winter. Here’s a review I wrote, and a mad lib-style interview with me.
for the bio final i thought of a mnemonic device...
tulletulle:
Katy
Perry
Can
Over-exaggerate
Fake
Girl
Sex
WHAT ABOUT PROM (aka my life story)
Blane: How are you doing?
Andie: Why haven't you called me?
Blane: Oh, I got nailed for the stable thing. I guess the groom saw us. It's against the rules.
Andie: I called you three times and i left messages.
Blane: Yeah? Well I didn't get them. My family... they're irresponsible about that stuff, you know?
Andie: I waited for you this morning.
Blane: Yeah? Where?
Andie: Parking lot. I saw you and I thought you saw me.
Blane: No.
Andie: What about prom, Blane?
Blane: Andie, I'm having a bad day. Can we talk later?
Andie: No. What about prom?
Blane: Why don't we meet after school?
Andie: No! What abot prom?
Blane: Andie, come on.
Andie: Just say it.
Blane: What?
Andie: Just say it. I wanna hear you say it.
Blane: Andie, please, all right?
Andie: I wanna hear you say it.
Blane: A month ago, I asked somebody else and I forgot.
[Andie pushes him against a locker]
Andie: You're a liar! You're a filthy, fucking, no-good liar. You don't have the guts to tell me the truth. Just say it!
Blane: I'm not lying.
Andie: Tell me!
Watchsciencefiction:
New work: I Don’t Ever Wanna Feel, 2010. Made to be projected at an overly large size in a well-lit room.
Oh god, this is so good. Scar Tissue forever.
Living In Olympia, Washington Versus New York City
“Everyone keeps talking about this co-op, and how it’s great and healthy, and how one of them even has a salad bar, and I don’t really have an excuse for not going there, other than I’m just sort of being a brat about it. Plus you have to buy a membership, and probably bring your own shopping bag. I’m just not ready.”
Yes, yes, yes! My personal rebellion in college was to never set...
My feelings. (The chorus, mostly.)
“Also hi hello, leggings are another way of fucking the patriarchy, because by wearing leggings, we’re highlighting yet another part of our body that/which we’re taught should look a certain way before we highlight it. Leggings are your way of saying ‘this is what my legs look like DEAL WITH IT.’”
The only advice I am qualified to give
periodtumblr:
This is the only advice I’m qualified to give. This is the only advice that if you don’t follow it, you will regret it. Learn from my mistake.
NEVER do acid on your period.
Submitted by psychotropicpolotics
Perhaps you know this about me, but I’m incredibly prissy when it comes to matters of the bathroom. I hate toilet humor, and I would never buy a child that Everybody...